Limbo state

This as strange as it sounds is the most reliable explanation you'll get if you ask me where the hell I've been this past two weeks. Yep, in the limbo; lacking empathy some days and falling into a downward spiral of despair and guilt the others.


... my personal life is not complicated; it's a chaos.

To start with I must explain briefly what led to that state of permanent change:
First I wanted space between David and I, just a little time to live apart after two years of living together totally overwhelmed and stressed over the matter of compromise. That happened almost 3 weeks ago.
And now that things are finally settled, that after anguishes, pain, cries and long, long honest talks about our feelings we met a point of agreement in living apart but staying together, the odds plot against us: There is a certain possibility of David getting a job in Madrid. And I don't want him to go.
I don't know what's wrong with my head, sometimes I'm not empathic at all, I feel like I was in a limbo, separated from the rest of the people, only concentrated in my own pain, which I assure you is enough for the day. I don't want him to go, but I don't want him to stay just because of me, just because of what happened. I don't want him to fear.

I know what I feel. I know what he feels. What I don't know is why the hell I'm not going to the psycho and try to fix my fuck*ng bipolarity ¬¬ its really annoying.



Ps: I'm not making it up, I'm bipolar for real. And lots of other things XD I've had a complicated life, some day I'll tell you..
Ps2: I don't want him to go!!!!!!!!!!
Ps3: yesterday we went out at night for "partying"...................... XD ok, not really, but it was fun.
(it was cold _O_)